When I was a little girl people would always say something to me along the lines of, “Sweetie, you have such a great mind and personality.” And even at that tender age I knew that it translated to, “You better study hard, kiddo, cause you ain’t gonna make it on your looks.” Especially when the other little girls were getting cooed over and told how pretty they were. I NEVER heard that pretty word. It was usually how smart I was for my age. Oh, I was smart, for sure, and I got the meaning right quick: UGLEE!!!!
So if you feel less than because of your face, let’s delve into that a bit. My first question would be. . . .
BY WHOSE STANDARDS?
Pretty or handsome a few hundred years ago was different than it was in the ancient world and it’s different now than it was even 10-20 years ago. So if someone makes a disparaging remark about your looks, whose standard are they using? I mean, if we’re all being judged by the standard of Kim Kardashian. . .sultry and T&A (enhanced). . . or Taylor Swift. . . tall, skinny & blonde. . . many of us are NOT gonna measure up.
EVERYONE HAS A PERSONAL PREFERENCE
One of the hottest men out there right now is Jason Momoa. Know what I think about Jason? Yeah, but basically MEH. He just doesn’t do anything for me. I never conformed to the masses when it came to male and/or female beauty. I was always the class clown so my criteria in a friend was someone who could make me laugh my rather sizeable ass off. And beauty DOES fade. There better be something in that brain if you’re gonna last for a long, long time. I just had my 50th wedding anniversary and Ray and I can still talk about anything and everything. And neither one of us looks like we did on that day oh so long ago. So bear in mind that everyone prefers one look over another and there’s not much you can do about it.
WHY DO YOU CARE?
Why does someone’s opinion of you matter so much? Especially those that you don’t know. Many of you know that I’ve been posting a lot of pics of me lately in my ongoing attempt to accept myself once and for all. I get some pretty rude comments. I simply delete and block. Up to a few years ago, I would have cried for days and never posted another pic. Why? I was never looking for a career ruled by looks as in being a model or an airline stewardess/steward or anything else where your face/body is part of your resume. Never had an urge to try my luck in Hollywood or on any other stage. So why does it matter what I look like?
In my case, it was my mother constantly telling me I was fat and ugly. It colored everything. But as I age into the last part of my life. . . why does it matter? I know I’m not ugly. Fat, yeah, well. . . but I’m okay. And okay is. . . well, OKAY!!!!
Anything anyone says about you is simply their opinion. You DO you know about opinions, don’t you? (Sorry/not sorry for being gross here.) “Opinions are like assholes. Everybody’s got one.”
THE ORIGINAL YOU IS BETTER THAN A COPY OF ANYONE
There are so many wannabe movie stars, models, rappers, influencers, you name it in this world. Do we need one more? HELL NO!!!! Do we need YOU, your authentic self? HELL YES!!!! Why be a second rate copy of someone else when you, yourself and YOU are the best thing going? Are those people everyone is trying to emulate good looking? Yes, they are. Are they smart? Well, some are, I’m sure. Are any of them attempting to save the world? Again, maybe some are, but all I seem to read about is their newest car, home, expensive wardrobe, trip overseas, mega-expensive beauty treatment, etc. etc. etc. ad nauseam. ME ME ME!!!! That’s their battle cry. It’s not mine and I hope it’s not yours either.
The world needs YOU and ME to be exactly who we are, our BEST self. We’re the ones who are going to make a difference. And it doesn’t matter what our face looks like in the mirror. Do your best on that face. If you want to wear makeup, wear it. If you don’t, don’t. Take the best care of it you can. And then go out and show ’em your stuff!!!!
17 to 70. . . hair is gray and lots more wrinkles, but. . . it’s ME!!!!
