Social Media. It’s sure changed our lives. I’ve been around a long time and this is like a juggernaut no one can stop or even kick into slow gear. I mean, hey, I was married by the time that first Atari ping-pong ball flew over the net. I remember what it was like before. Maybe not as good in many ways, but maybe better in others. And I know some of you don’t even remember a time before you had a phone in your hand. That’s okay, too, but you have to learn that a lot of it may or may not be real.
Does Jealousy Rear Its Ugly Head?
Are you jealous of everyone and everything you see on Social Media? Do all those great stories of happy families, beautiful clothes, new boats and new homes you see day after day in your news feed make you feel like you’re not worthy? You’re eating a PB&J sandwich for lunch as you see a friend at a restaurant eating something you love but can’t afford. Do you think everyone gets everything EXCEPT YOU? This is a really destructive mindset. Destructive for YOU. Trust me when I say the posters don’t care.
The Age of Fakers
People fake things all the time. You know that anyone can take or snag a pic and post anything they want. Look at the influencers on FB and Instagram. Can we spell P-H-O-T-S-H-O-P, boys and girls? I’m sure there are other programs out there, too, to make them look what society thinks of as perfect. Now if you know people personally, you may be able to figure out what’s real and what’s not. But if it’s someone you’ve admired or just friended on FB, Twitter or other Social Media or you’re fangirling someone on the Gram. . . well, you’re not sure what to think. And if it’s always lollipops and roses day after day, it can make you feel depressed since it’s not happening that way for you. Sure, the hottie and everything about them looks good. In fact, it looks damn fine. Just remember, you can stand in a garage and that don’t make you a car!!!!
Example. I can get a dupe of a designer outfit for maybe $59 on Amazon, take a drive and stand in front of someone’s million-dollar home, snap some pics and then photoshop my body into what the world wants to see. Does that make it real? NO. HELL NO!!!! But when you come across that shot on my Instagram, you think it’s real and you feel bad cause it ain’t you. Meanwhile, that person collects her/his money for the shots and goes back to that small apartment eating PB&J. You’ve been taken, my friend.
Are You Focused on Money and Things?
If you’re focused on money and things it’s easier to get discouraged when you don’t have one or both. And I DO understand that with today’s current prices it’s easy to be fixated on money. You need it. And you need more of it to live today than you did last year. This is one of my personal demons. I wage war with it daily. And, yes, everything IS about looks in our superficial society. But not all of them look that way or have that much money or that many things. (See Example Above)
So What Do You Do To Get Unjealous?
Different strokes for different folks. I would say the best solution is to limit your time on social media. I know, I know. Much easier said than done. But still. . . it’s the easiest and cheapest solution. And if there is an account that makes you feel particularly bad, delete it, block it, do whatever you have to do to avoid looking at it. You don’t need to feel that sadness and jealousy. It won’t do you any good.
Try getting a handle on yourself. Narrow it down. Do you know why you’re jealous? I mean, REALLY why. In my case, it’s because I know I can never look like some of these folks even with a body transplant. Things don’t mean all that much to me. But if they do to you, you may have some serious work to do on yourself. God forbid you drop on the street tomorrow, all the nice things in the world won’t help. I am NOT judging you. I like nice things as much as the next guy, but I can do without them.
Try to appreciate what you already have. I know for some of you that’s not much, but see what you can do here. Something like, “Oh, that bed in that shot is GORGEOUS, but my own bed is super comfy and snuggles me every night.” If this doesn’t work and you NEED new furniture, maybe pick up a side gig or a second job and start a savings account just for the new furnishings. Just working towards this goal will make you feel better. This works for that extreme cut & color you saw on Ms. Fancy Pants, too. Some of the hair I’ve seen would cost me $500+ to get here and this is NOT a fancy area.
The bottom line here is. . . know that social media is NOT real 95% of the time. It’s a fantasy land even better than Disney’s as Disney’s is fixed in place. This one has infinite variety and possibilities. Folks who have always wanted to be someone now CAN. Or think they can. (Again, see above Example)
BOTTOM LINE: LOVE YOURSELF!!!! Not everybody else and the car they’re standing in front of. Guess what? It may not be theirs.
Take a few minutes to listen to this episode of “True Crime Recaps.”
See where unrequited extreme jealousy can lead.