Do you feel like you don’t measure up because you take a lousy photo? Don’t laugh. It’s a real thing. In my case, my mother used to chase me out of the pics because she said I ruined them. So I got very wary every time I saw a camera and ran like hell. I mean, hey, I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s pics with my ugly face, right? I missed out on a lot.
It’s not just me. Do you know how on FB groups they call for photos or selfies? If you open the stream, there will invariably be a handful of people who just say something and never post a pic. And then you see pics of people you recognize, but don’t know. Why? They snagged that pic from somewhere else. Because this problem is near and dear to my heart, I started really thinking about it and I came up with three things I think play heavily into this phobia of avoiding the camera. If you have other reasons to be camera-shy, please leave me a comment, K?
You Feel You Don’t Measure Up
Don’t measure up to who or what? What society thinks is acceptable, in most cases. And maybe it’s not society. Maybe it’s you. In our now-visual world we look at pics of the “beautiful people” day after day after day. Surely, I don’t look like that? Well, you’re probably right. The majority of us don’t. But day after day of photoshopped pics, figures improved with surgeries and professional makeup have given us a big inferiority complex. So no pics. Surely nobody wants to look at me, right?
You Have A Vision In Your Head Of What You Look Like And It’s Not What You See On Camera
They say the camera doesn’t lie. Yeah, in a way, but I kinda sorta disagree. The camera will show you every line and wrinkle, every strange expression and. . . oh yeah, don’t forget those 10 extra pounds. But unless you allow it, it can’t capture your personality. It’s a cold hard thing in someone’s (hopefully) capable hands. This is why GOOD professional photographers can command their price. They know how to work their instrument to bring out your personal best. It’s a gift. But if your friend wants pics on her smartphone and you run, you need to re-evaluate the situation. And guess what? You may have a vision in your head of what you look like, but that vision may be wrong! People say they view the world through rose-colored glasses. But for many, we view who we see in the mirror with 💩-colored glasses.
You Don’t Want A *Bad* Pic Of You Out There In Cyberspace So You Don’t Take Any
Do you remember that big brouhaha where Khloe Kardashian had a world-class meltdown over a pic of herself someone released without the photoshop treatment? I thought it was a beautiful, natural pic. She went off. Big time. Take this as a prime example of what you see is not exactly what you get. In Khloe’s case, she didn’t want this one pic marring her brand. It didn’t look like the rest of her super glamorous (and photoshopped) pics. Today’s world is 95% illusion. But people don’t see that. All they see is beautiful people. And since we know we can’t get a decent pic that meets our exhausting specs, we simply don’t take any.
Some Ways To Help
(1 ) Start with group pics. If you have to, at first, hide parts of you behind someone else. If you don’t mind your head, but feel your body isn’t right, then duck behind someone and stick your beautiful head up. Eventually start adding a little bit more of you in the pics until you can get your whole body in there. If this takes a year, two years, whatever, so be it. But you WILL do it.
(2) Use your phone and practice selfies. Do it alone. If you hate every single pic, nobody has to know. DELETE, DELETE, DELETE. Ain’t digital photography grand? My husband will take 50-100 shots of me modeling clothes and then watch me delete every damned one as I say, “Let’s do it again.” I need to be able to post a pic that I don’t find objectionable and won’t make me click out of my newsfeed when I see it. So if you take a gazillion pics to get ONE, hey, you’ve got ONE. I remember talking to a professional photographer who told me she took at least 500 shots to get maybe 5 or 10 she thought useable.
(3) Wear the clothes and makeup that make you feel your best. If you’re all gussied up in the bridesmaid’s dress you wore for your cousin’s wedding and you hate it, it will show in the pics. If you’re at your best in a tee shirt and jeans, put those on. Make it your FAVORITE tee and your most COMFY pair of jeans. No sense adding more stress to an already stressful situation. And then shoot away! If you don’t want anyone around, set up a tripod with your phone on it, set the framing you need/want and then work the hell out of that 10-second timer as you become your own photographer.
(4) Put some music on. If you like relaxation music or what I think You Tube lists as “study music,” use that. If you like heavy metal, put on some Anthrax or Metallica. If you like country, you have lots and lots of choices. Me? I have a Credence Clearwater playlist on Spotify. I put the music on the iPad and shoot with the iPhone. And even though this method guarantees me some fun as I dance around like a loon, it doesn’t guarantee I’ll like the pics. But it does guarantee that camera will get less scary if I have fun with it.
And In The End
Photographs. The bane of my existence for over 50 years. The bane of many in our visual world who feel they don’t measure up. Let me tell you something. YOU DO MEASURE UP!!!! You are you and you are enough. You look like YOU. Nobody else does. So why are you making the world miss out on your specialness? You don’t have to. And remember. . . digital photography. You can delete every pic you hate, even if the numbers are astronomical. 😎
One last thought. Someday, all your loved ones may have are photographs. Make sure there are at least a few for them to smile over. 💕